Midnight Thoughts: The Mind of Another Zoldyck
by Ria D'Arcy
Summary: Kalluto walks down one of the many hallways of the Zoldyck mansion on Kukuroo Mountain - what are his thoughts? Kinda-sequel to Midnight Thoughts. One shot.


I stepped purposefully through the dark corridors of my home on silent feet. Seeing in the dark was no problem for me, I had grown up in the dark. My family _was_ dark. Or so I heard from rumors.

I was the youngest of the newest Zoldyck generation. And was not nearly as accomplished as any of my elder brothers. Illumi-nii-sama was by far the most outstanding, but okaa-sama was always praising Killua-nii-san. Milluki-nii-san spent majority of his time locked away in his room on his beloved computer. And Alluka-nii-san was…

I wasn't allowed to think about him. Okaa-sama had forbidden me from even talking to that brother.

My silent footfalls stopped as I passed one of the few windows on the main level. It was narrow, just barely the width I needed if I ever so needed, or wanted, to escape. But I couldn't do that, it would ruin the purple and black kimono okaa-sama had wanted me to wear today.

Through the window I saw the mountain scenery which encircled our overly large estate. Kukuroo Mountain; a beautiful prison. One I someday hoped to escape from, like Kilua-nii-san had done not too long ago.

He had left, biding me farewell the night before, and went off to take the Hunter Exam. Illumi-nii-sama had followed. I had been left behind.

I was always left behind.

I looked up with my violet eyes to see a full silver moon rising above the trees. It was magnificence. But it too reminded me that I was not free. My life was set, just like the rise and fall of the Lady Moon. I was to forever obey the wishes of my okaa-sama and my otou-sama.

I turned away from the window, recognizing my dalliance and continued to walk the corridor on near-silent feet. I winced once as my slippers scoffed against the stone, the noise extremely loud in the still air. If okaa-sama had heard that mistake I would have been lectured on the importance of _never_ making a sound.

If not something worse… and few things were worse than okaa-sama's voice when she was annoyed. Or insulted… or _upset_…

I repressed the urge to visibly shudder as the memory of how okaa-sama had acted when Killua-nii-san said he was leaving resurfaced. I had not even been aware a human voice could obtain that high of a pitch. The idea of clawing my own drums until they rendered me deaf had briefly entertained my mind at the time.

My thoughts returned to the present once more as I continued forward, fully aware of every movement my body made as I approached okaa-sama's room. Though the hour was late it was not unusual for okaa-sama to request my presence. I was her shadow, her doll. Nothing more.

Illumi-nii-sama was the eldest, the example we were to eventually become.

Milluki-nii-san was the intelligence, though it rarely showed outside of the realm of technology.

Killua-nii-san was the prodigy and heir; the most doted upon by the elders.

Alluka-nii-san was the mistake, the screw up to be hidden in shame by the family.

Then that left me. What was I do be when I could not outshine my brothers? A living doll to occupy my mother until she either became bored or died.

Many days I wish she would simply be killed and leave me in peace. However, I knew that wish would never be granted. Okaa-sama was a Zoldyck; she may not have been born from the same blood but she was not where she was today because she was weak. I knew of only three people who could surely kill her, and they would never do so because she was kin.

My head bobbed down as my entire demeanor changed into one of humble obedience. I had arrived outside of okaa-sama's chambers. I raised my hand to knock, three times and no more.

"Come in Kalluto-chan!" Okaa-sama called from inside the room. I obeyed without a word, feeling some of the life drain from my eyes as I filled in my role as the obedient son. I knew only three words which the woman who had birthed me never tired of hearing. The correct response to every order or pretend-request she issued me.

_Hai okaa-sama._

* * *

_A/N: Not quite as long as the other one, but meh... An idea is an idea and when you can't sleep even something like this seems like gold. I'm just surprised I wrote this from Kalluto's POV - I usually forget about that particular Zoldyck :/ Oops~ Oh well, I guess you can count this as trying something new._


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